


How Long

by mkhhhx



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Cheating, Coffee Shops, Denial of Feelings, From Zero, Implied/Referenced Sex, M/M, Pining, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Unresolved Romantic Tension, dance academy - Freeform, everyone is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-01-22
Packaged: 2019-02-27 18:47:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13254438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mkhhhx/pseuds/mkhhhx
Summary: Minhyuk starts staying longer at work and Hyungwon's life is getting complicated.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry in advance. To everyone.

It starts off with subtle signs, Minhyuk looking at his phone screen turned away from Hyungwon’s curious eyes, staying at work a little too long. At first Hyungwon doesn’t even notice. Because, even after their fourth year together, he had no doubt his boyfriend was loyal to him.

It gets concerning, after a week when Minhyuk comes back home every night after eleven, having gone out to work before nine in the morning. More than suspicious, Hyungwon is concerned, that his boyfriend is overworking himself.

Minhyuk is his usual self, happy, cheesy and domestic as ever, so when he tells Hyungwon he has a large project going on at work, Hyungwon only waits for him to have dinner together, makes sure there is always warm water. He loves Lee Minhyuk way too much.

 

“Baby, that’s wonderful, did you make it yourself?”  
Hyungwon flashes him a smile. He has become a better cook since they started living together and Minhyuk was never the one to turn down a well-cooked steak.  
It’s one of the rare times Minhyuk is home early and they are planning on napping after lunch to have the afternoon to themselves, Hyungwon not having to open up the dance academy, since it’s Sunday.

“How’s the project going sweetheart?”  
Minhyuk looks up from his plate sheepishly, scratches his nape with a small giggle.

“Great, it’s going great.”

“Will it be over soon? And what is it about anyway?”  
Minhyuk swallows down and takes some moments to answer. He must be overwhelmed with work already, not wanting to talk about it in his limited time at home.

“It’s something like an advertising campaign, we are making posters and banners and stuff. It’s fun in a way, you know.”  
Hyungwon gets up from his place, opposed to Minhyuk and closes the distance between them, climbing on his boyfriend's lap and kissing his cheek.

“You are great at that and I hope you’ll finish the project soon, so I will have you all to myself.”  
Minhyuk captures his lips into a kiss, sweet and soft, like their first ones.

“You always have me all to yourself.”

 

“I haven’t seen Minhyuk since forever, is he coming to the performance?” Hoseok practically shouts from his class, two rooms away, gradually getting closer to help Hyungwon clean up the foggy mirror.

“He promised me he will, he just has a lot of work these days.”

“Being a cafe manager in the center is tough huh?”

“I guess.”  
Hyungwon has been at the cafe a lot of times. It’s always filled with people, the baristas barely having time to catch their breaths.

“Let’s close up quickly Wonnie, I’m sweaty as hell. I’m never taking the toddler class again.”

“You love it you big softie.”  
Hyungwon pinches Hoseok’s bicep and doesn’t miss the way his eyes light up. They’ve always been like this when they were together, for years.

 

“Are you coming to the performance next weekend honey?”  
Minhyuk, from his place on the armchair, in front of his laptop seems to be in mild panic, looking back at Hyungwon.

“Next Saturday, at 8 in the afternoon...right?”

“Right.”

“Yeah, of course, I promised I’ll come, didn’t I?”

Hyungwon feels a pleased smile creeping on his face. They’re alright, Minhyuk never missed a single one of his performances since they met.

 

‘“You missed a turn.”

“Shit sorry.”

“Let’s take a break.”

Hoseok immediately collapses on the floor, stretching his hand to reach his water bottle, in vain. Hyungwon gives it to him and sits on the wooden floor as well.

“I’m sorry Wonnie, I’ll be more concentrated.”

“It’s not a matter of concentration hyung, you need to relax, you know the steps.”

It’s almost midnight and they’ve been practicing since their classes ended, hours ago. The kids and teenagers are gonna perform first, but Hyungwon and Hoseok, teachers and owners of the academy decided to dance too, for the closing act.

“Maybe it’s the song…”

“I love the song.”

Hoseok was always insecure. About the song he produced and sang together with Hyungwon, about his dancing skills, about declaring his love. Hyungwon has been comforting him for the first two since they were at high school. He never said anything for the third one, even if he knew since they first met.  
They get up to go through the choreo one last time before they head to their respective homes.

 

The cafe is, as predicted, busy. Mostly with college students at this hour of the day, almost lunch time. Hyungwon, with Minhyuk’s bento box enters, the familiar bell chiming upon opening the door. Minhyuk has been working in the cafe for half a decade, since he was a scrawny college student, until last year he got promoted to manager.

He spots his boyfriend leaning on the counter and talking to a barista, a new one. They are sitting close to each other, laughing loud and clear for everyone to hear. He always adored Minhyuk’s laugh. He gets closer and gently clears his throat, to get their attention.

Minhyuk jerks up and the boy beside him flashes a professional smile.

“What can we prepare for you sir?”  
Hyungwon chuckles, it was rare for someone in the cafe to not know how he likes his coffee.

“You must be new here, I’ll just take the manager.”

“That’s off menu sir” the boy answers, not missing a beat, Minhyuk’s eyes on the counter, a faint blush on his cheeks.

“Not for me…” he takes a moment to read the nametag “...Changkyun. I am Hyungwon, Minhyuk’s boyfriend.”

Changkyun softly gasps, looking at Minhyuk with a confused expression and then giving his hand to Hyungwon for a brief handshake.

“Nice to meet you...Hyungwon hyung.”  
Hyungwon leaves the bento box to Minhyuk and sits on a table, waiting for his coffee.

Changkyun brings it to him soon, leaves it next to his open laptop and awkwardly stands next to the table until Hyungwon rips his gaze off the screen.

“Yes?”

“Uhm...It’s just that I’ve never seen you around before. Have you started dating Minhyuk hyung recently?”

“Five years ago. Which is recent compared to the infinite amount of time the universe has been through, yes.”

“Oh”

“How’s the project going?”

“What project hyung?”

“The...you must not know about it. I think it’s time to go back to work Changkyun.” He points at the customers waiting, with Jooheon, the other barista running around to make the beverages.

“Right hyung, see you around.”

Hyungwon puts his earphones on and concentrates on finding new songs for his classes, until it’s time to go to the academy.

 

Hyungwon claps once, twice, shouts a bit but his voice is soft, caring. It’s Friday night, the last meeting with his students before their performance. They are all great and before leaving he makes himself deliver an encouraging speech, pat their backs, tell them they’ll do great. He reminds their parents they’ll need to be a little early for the performance, hiding his stress bitten nails behind his back.

“Finished?” Hoseok peeks from the office, hair dump and sticking on his forehead. He’s wearing a loose shirt, one he stole from Hyungwon ages ago and gray sweatpants.

“Let’s do our part a couple times before leaving.”  
Hoseok agrees and goes to the laptop plugged to the sound system, to put their song. Soft vocals fill the spacious room as they take their positions.  
Hyungwon kneels and Hoseok with two fingers lifts his chin. They lock eyes and look at each other, skin shiny under the artificial lights, in all of its sweaty glory.

“Come back to me” Hoseok mouths in sync with the song and Hyungwon knows there’s more meaning to it, but it’s late and he’s tired and they’ve been friends for so many years that he doesn’t want to make it more complicated than it already is.

 

Hoseok has a car and Hyungwon is too tired to wait for the bus, so he drops him off at home, turning on the car’s radio to soft pop and making small talk. Hoseok is good with people and Hyungwon is glad to have him, bidding goodnight and ensuring each other that everything will be perfect the next day.

Minhyuk is on the couch, snoring, the television open and showing some generic advertisement program. Hyungwon leans to kiss his forehead and watches him stretch and slowly wake up.

“Baby” Minhyuk makes grabby hands at him and Hyungwon laughs.

“You know I can’t carry you.”

He pecks his boyfriend’s lips and coos at him, until they are brushing their teeth and tuck themselves into their bed, legs intertwined.

“You’ll do great tomorrow.”

“You have not seen our choreography” Hyungwon pouts and Minhyuk kisses it away.

“I just know.”

 

The day is hectic, meeting with Hoseok for lunch and going together to the theatre where the performance will take place. They need to make sure that everything will be in order and ready for the kids. They check the lights and the sound system and they dance in front of an imaginary audience.  
Just before the first kids start arriving, they are sitting side to side, chugging down energy drinks, knowing it’s gonna be a long night.

“I want to write more songs for you” Hoseok whispers, “for us.”

“Then write.” Hyungwon messes Hoseok’s hair and gets up, spotting a little girl from his class with her parents at the door.

 

Time passes quickly and Hyungwon is getting anxious. They are almost ready to start and Minhyuk is nowhere to be found. He scans the seats again and again but he can’t find the white haired man anywhere. He has no time to call, the kids loud and stressed. His job is to be with Hoseok backstage, comforting them. The lights dim and his chest gets lighter, spotting a mess of a white hair entering the room the last moment, finding his seat in one of the front rows.

 

The kids are wonderful. They make small mistakes, visible only to the trained eye. Hoseok is smiling like the proudest parent of them all, in his open gray blazer, matching Hyungwon’s fancy clothes. It’s their turn for the closing event and he can see all the mums in the crowd practically drool once they set foot on the stage. Those and Minhyuk, who has his gaze on Hyungwon for the whole song. Hyungwon can feel him watching them intensely from the second row, when they dance together and when Hoseok’s touch lingers on Hyungwon for a bit longer than necessary.

There’s an applause, every student on stage and Hoseok, as the founder of the academy delivers his heartfelt speech and then passes the microphone to Hyungwon, who’s not that good with words but manages just fine. There’s hugging and the after party starts, the feistier of the parents climbing on stage to dance to the latest hits.

Hyungwon is talking to a little boy when Minhyuk approaches him, still in his work clothes with a deep blue cardigan thrown over them. He looks beautiful as ever, taking Hyungwon to dance together. Hyungwon acts as if he doesn’t notice Hoseok’s sad eyes, looking at them from a distance.

 

They stumble inside their home, Hyungwon sloppily taking Minhyuk’s clothes off, all the way to the bedroom, not wanting to take his lips off him. Minhyuk pushes him down on the bed and climbs on top of him, kissing and mouthing and marking, doing everything he knows will make Hyungwon moan his name. Minhyuk spends the whole night making love to Hyungwon and saying how much he loves him.

 

Hyungwon wakes up in a good mood, Minhyuk sleeping soundly next to him, bathed in the rich morning sunlight. He finds some decent clothes and closing the door behind him to not disturb his lover he steps in the kitchen, preparing coffee and then deciding to take a shower.

Stepping into the tiled room, he notices Minhyuk’s phone’ left on a cabinet, vibrating, the screen lighting up with messages. Curiosity gets the best of him once he notices the sender’s name, being Changkyun. It may be something important about work. He only gets to read the two last messages before the screen turns black again.

“Hyung, we need to stop.”

“What if your boyfriend finds out?”

He knows it’s not about work.

 

He doesn’t talk to Minhyuk about it, doesn’t mention the strange behavior, greeting him with a warm smile every night. He’s still so in love, refuses to believe that Minhyuk is not. He just waits, notices all the small things. That project that is taking too long and Minhyuk’s phone that now has a password even if Hyungwon never really opened it without permission. How Minhyuk tells him he loves him and it sounds like he’s trying to convince himself that he does.

Hyungwon gets more frustrated with each passing day. He lets it all out dancing and Hoseok is there to watch him, careful eyes following his movements, body joining after a while. It’s beautiful, when they dance together, it’s passionate and hot and sensual. It’s whatever they want it to be, fogging up the windows and falling on top of each other, Hoseok driving him back home every night after work.

 

It’s a Friday and Hyungwon finishes with his classes early. Hoseok has still work to do and Hyungwon decides to not wait for him, paying his boyfriend a visit at work. He walks there, it’s a bit far but the weather is nice and having his music on he doesn’t mind.

The cafe is just closing up, Jooheon who’s moping the main area recognizing and letting Hyungwon get in. Apart from him, the cafe is empty.

“Where’s Mr.Boss?” Hyungwon jokingly asks and Jooheon takes a look around, like he’s worried about something, before he answers, in a small voice.

“He’s in his office I think.”

Hyungwon pats his shoulder and heads to the backrooms.

Minhyuk’s office is the last room of a long corridor, door shut, the faint noises of movements and talking slipping out. Hyungwon gets close enough. He could recognize Minhyuk’s voice anywhere, muffled, needy, in a way it should be reserved only for Hyungwon. The second voice is deep, whiny and he has a good idea of whom it could belong to.

 

He knows the door does not lock, placing his palm on the handle, preparing himself. He hopes that it’s just his imagination running wild. He pushes the door open and freezes over the sight. Minhyuk and Changkyun are looking at him like deer caught in the headlights. Changkyun is on the desk, Minhyuk between his legs and Hyungwon doesn’t need any explanation.

“How long?” is the only question he can manage to get out, the only one that matters at the moment.

“Look Hyungwon, I know it seems bad and I am not saying it is not what it looks like, but I am sorry, I promise it’s just…”

“How long Minhyuk.”

“Four months.”

“Alright.”

Minhyuk looks like he is about to say something more but Hyungwon shuts the door, getting out from the backdoor of the shop.

 

He doesn’t know for how long he’s been running, tears wetting his face but he’s standing in front of the academy, his set of keys in his hand. The lights are on, meaning Hoseok is still inside. He unlocks and goes straight to his room, plugging his phone and turning the volume all the way up.

He knows Hoseok is watching him dance. He knows the older one is worried because it’s one in the morning and he is supposed to be home. He knows that when the song ends and the room goes quiet Hoseok is stepping in front of him. He knows he is crying, shirt stained.

“Hyungwon, what happened?”

Hyungwon looks at him, the genuine concern in Hoseok’s eyes, the love.

“Hyung.” He starts but he doesn’t know what to say. He grabs Hoseok by the collar, pushes him up the mirror.

Hoseok is trembling and Hyungwon kisses him.

“That’s wrong” Hoseok says and then he kisses back, like his life depends on it.

“That’s so wrong” Hyungwon agrees, hands pulling Hoseok closer, flat on his body.

“Why Hyungwon?” Hoseok moans into his mouth and it’s a sound Hyungwon never thought he would want to hear again so much.

“He’s cheating on me. Minhyuk is cheating on me oh god, do that again.”

Hoseok’s thigh slots between his legs and rubs up and Hyungwon leans down, to decorate Hoseok’s neck with hickeys. He never thought his lips would look so good on white skin, but he notices they do, looking at himself in the mirror behind Hoseok.

“We need to stop” Hoseok says, out of breath.

“Take me home with you hyung.”

 

Hyungwon wakes up sore, in a bed that is not his own. He searches for his clothes, the trail of discarded pieces leading him to the living room of the small apartment, where Hoseok is sleeping on the couch, a blanket thrown over him. In his pants pocket he finds his phone, screen buzzing with missed calls and messages, all from Minhyuk. He completely shuts it off.

Hoseok wakes up, messy hair and droopy eyes, looking so soft nested in the blanket. Hyungwon knows he is not wearing anything underneath.

“Hyungwon” he starts, in his rough morning voice “we need to talk.”

Hyungwon nods and sits on the couch next to Hoseok’s form.

“Yes, we do.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I know I said I don't plan of writing more for this, but many people asked and then inspiration came, so this small chapter was born. You'll probably be a little disappointed, but Hyungwonnie only deserves the best.

Minhyuk calls, again and again, messages and leaves voicemails until Hyungwon thinks he’ll go crazy and throws his phone on the wall. It breaks but it’s okay, because the next day he goes to buy a new one with Hoseok, with a new number and a plain background without Minhyuk on it.

He sneaks into the house at hours he knows it will be empty a couple times and fetches clothes. He never quite realized how many shirts he shared with Minhyuk. He takes the ones only he was wearing.

He asks to stay over for one more night and it becomes two and three and a whole week and Hoseok still shows how much he wants him there, in his small apartment. He says he is sorry, for pushing him on the bed when he was vulnerable the night he cried in the academy and Hyungwon kisses him again, kisses him until he can’t feel the tears running down his face and he can’t make out Hoseok’s lips from Minhyuk’s.

Hoseok is patient, Hoseok is kind, he cooks for Hyungwon, he lets him have the bed, he rubs his back when the bad thoughts and memories kick in and he can’t help the sobs. He asks himself if he is too dramatic, if he needs to give Minhyuk a chance, at least to talk.

Four months, Minhyuk was cheating on him for four months, while Hyungwon was waiting for him every night to come from work, when he had scheduled all of his classes so they can have their free days together. Hyungwon’s whole live was revolving around him.

Hoseok’s house is closer to the academy and Hyungwon loves it. He dances to remember all the good times and to forget the bad ones. He dances until his feet are bruised and he’s the only person still awake. He looks at his reflection at the mirror and smiles. Dancing was the only part of himself he never gave to Minhyuk.

The kids are nice, the kids love him and they love Hoseok. They are happy, not having to deal with all the misfortunes of the world. But they too, sense that something is wrong, in his droopy eyes and slight slouch. He tries to get well soon for them. For them and for the man watching him from the next room, with so much love in his eyes.

He knows he loves Hoseok, but he’s afraid of loving him the way Hoseok wants him to, wholly, as something so much more than a friend. But maybe he already does, because lately Hoseok’s gentle hands and his soothing voice are staring to have strange effects on him.

Minhyuk gets replaced with Hoseok in his mind. And just like sometime everything was Minhyuk, now everything is Hoseok. Hyungwon wears his clothes and cooks for him and they dance and one night he pulls him to the bed and they dance in another way. The next morning they have nothing to talk about, they know they won’t stop.

He thinks he has this figured out, but something, dark and disgusting stirs at the pits of his mind, urges him to pass in front of the café Minhyuk works, see if he is inside, if Changkyun is still there, if it was all a dream.

Minhyuk is at the front counter, working with Jooheon. They take orders and make drinks and put cake slices in paper plates. He stays at the glass door and hopes nobody sees him. Silently asking for someone to notice that he is still there, that he is hurting and that he can’t cope with the fact that it is over.

Jooheon is the first one that lifts his eyes. He leans and talks to Minhyuk and then Hyungwon is met with his gaze. Minhyuk stands there, a carton of milk in his hands, mouth slightly agape. He doesn’t shout, doesn’t run to Hyungwon, he does nothing but stare before returning to his job and Hyungwon is disappointed.

There are more accidental encounters, Hyungwon passing out of the coffee shop and Minhyuk out of the studio. Grocery shopping from the same store, lurking near their house the time he knew Minhyuk went to work.

It’s a late night at the practice room again, when Minhyuk notices that Hoseok’s car is not parked outside and stumbles inside, a little sloppily, a little drunk. Hyungwon melts into his touch and lets Minhyuk take him back home for the night.

He has to face the consequences the next morning and he thinks it’s bad enough when he has to leave without waking Minhyuk up, without falling for his soft eyes all over again but then it’s a hundred times worse when he has to face Hoseok before their first lesson and his clothes are wrinkled and he smells like Minhyuk again. Hoseok doesn’t ask.

“Come back home” Minhyuk pleads between rushed kisses, “I love you Hyungwon” he says and Hyungwon closes his eyes and tries to imagine being together again.

“Come back to me” Hoseok mouths his favorite lyrics, “this song is for you Hyungwon” he says and Hyungwon tries to imagine being together.

He swings back and forth, spends his night here and there and sometimes just collapses at work, on a chair. It gets tiring and he can’t cope with all of the attention on him anymore. Down to the details, Hoseok and Minhyuk are, in fact, the same. They love hard and they fall in love impulsively and pine and are ready to shout and show their emoticons. But it all comes down to possessiveness, Hyungwon being some kind of trophy, a ball they can kick back and forth.

Summer comes and it gets worse, without the dancing classes and with so much more free time to spend somehow. He refuses going to holidays because frankly, he has gotten tired of Hoseok handling him like he’s fragile.

 

He’s been awake for thirty hours and sleep doesn’t come to him. His clothes smell of Hoseok’s detergent and Minhyuk’s favorite alcohol. He leaves the dance academy with his wallet and nothing else, writes a message for Hoseok to find.

He walks to the nearest bus station, finds the bus that can take him the furthest and impulsively looks for apartments. He spends the whole day out and crashes in a hotel, sleeping alone after so long.

The next day he rents a tiny apartment and starts searching for work, shops for everything he needs. He settles in with the only right person he has at the moment, himself.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> You can come shout at me.


End file.
